Monday, September 5, 2011

The seriousness with which I approach my future

I'm presently working on practice sets for the GRE while drinking a bottle of $6 Chardonnay--straight out of the bottle. It's actually pretty tasty--Whole Foods doesn't sell shit wine, or the yuppies would stop going there.

I realize that I need to do much better than the 1200 I got last round (in my defense, I didn't study much and I was really sick), but I'm distressed that the results of this standardized test may prove to me and the rest of the world that I'm not actually smart, nor capable of attending grad school.

Hence the wine.

Also, reading these ridiculous GRE passages through the veil of alcohol causes them to become much more understandable. I may consider pregaming the test.


  1. i was just about to suggest pregaming. :)

    also, careful how many times you take that thing. if you're shootin baskets and you miss, everyone thinks it was a fluke. but if you shoot twice and miss, then everyone knows you're not em-jay.

    also, i think i got stupid scores on it, too. did you try applying in spite of your discontent?


  2. Actually, it turns out it (at least the verbal) was a hell of a lot easier...or maybe it was because I wasn't sick this time around...but I did much better. And I'm applying for fall of next year, so I figured I'd take a shot (ha) at the new one and see how it went.

    But yeah, thanks for the advice...I'd heard that it looks bad if you take it too often.

    And I'm going to assume you at least did well on the math. I got something like a 630 the first time...